Showing posts with label wedding gifts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wedding gifts. Show all posts

Wednesday, 4 May 2011

Will Kate knot be going away after all? Well, I like them, even if no one else does...

Back from a slew of bank holidays, wedding party (not mine, of course), and a barbeque! Unfortunately Will & Kate didn't get a bid, but, hey! This means I get to keep them as a wonderful showpiece. The Red Cross will get their donation regardless, so it's still win-win all round.

Several other good things came out of this too, I received invitations from Yahoo! UK Media Relations and CNN iReport to upload my photos to their album and website respectively. They're both open forums, and anyone can post, still it was jolly nice to get a personal message from their representatives. I'd also had interest from a news agency (the kind that sells photos and stories to newspapers, not the kind that sells newpapers and convenience food) about the possibility of working on a longer term project, so it's been an exciting and busy time for me.

But I've wondered recently if it's generally uncool to admit that you're excited about the royal wedding, 'cos the only people I could find to watch it with were an old-school Briton and Canadian who liked a good ol' reminisce about Royal Britannia, which helps to kindle your excitement a bit.

Someone I know just said 'Who gives a s**t about the royal wedding!' Yup, it's a '!', no '?' The bomb drops and obliterates all conversation. Recent history has taught us never to interfere with extremists and their views on anything, no matter how well-founded the roots of those views might be, and how well-intentioned the interference. Right? That's until a brave soul tries to pick up the pieces and practically whispers...so, uh, anyone up for nipping down the pub later? Ah yes, when in doubt, let's turn to a good old-fashioned pint! It numbs the blow, and prevents you having to grasp at straws when the barman throws a lemon in your gin & tonic.

Here's a little thought on the side: Isn't it an awfully strange coincidence the news that Osama has bin laden to rest comes immediately after the Dude and Duchess of Cambridge request privacy, having helicoptered off to their lives as normal people yadda yadda, and media interest dies down? I just hope that the rest of us will also enjoy peace after this.

One of the things I cherish most about living in Britain is that it's taught me the value of agreeing to disagree. I welcome all perspectives and hope I've been successful in keeping an open mind generally. Therefore, it irked me to be told that no one (myself included, presumably) gives a s**t about national events that happen once every few decades. Cynics are entitled to their view, of course, but I sometimes can't help but feel that the Malvolios out there claim a certain moral and intellectual high ground by objecting to all this. We're not so easily manipulated, stop spending all our money on this nonsense, you can't make us forget job cuts by throwing one feel-good party...what do you take us for, idiots? seem to resonate amongst RW protesters.

Personally, if what I've seen on evenings out at the weekends is anything to go by, folks have little trouble spending their own money anyway. Plenty of funds are spent on security at public events *ahem football matches*, emergency services for accidents *drunks cough cough* and healthcare for everyone (yes, whether you smoke like a chimney, drink like a fish or are a careerwoman who's discovered, aged 40, that you can't conceive naturally).

I was heartened to discover afterwards that many people I know had been curled up in front of the telly on the 29th, even if they chose to reserve comment on it. See, cynics, how you have driven the rest of us to obscurity? Actually I thought the RW was a splendid occasion, and rather excellent value, considering we just had to pick up the tab for public safety. It's all about personal choice, at the end of the day...which is what my adopted country is all about. So I'm really glad I decided to reject all the cynicism and enjoy the royal wedding.

What can I say?

I like G&T, I always ask for lemon in it, I also like girls in dresses, men in uniform AND I'd rather feel good than be left out of the party.

Some things just have to be done.

Will & Kate too, preferred to watch the wedding in private.


Congratulations Will & Kate, thanks for letting us in on your wedding and I wish you a happy life together!

Wednesday, 13 April 2011

Will Kate, or won't they...? A Half-Poem in Celebration of the Dolls I Made in Celebration of Prince William, His Royal Wedding to Miss Catherine Middleton, etc etc.

[Said in my best reporter's voice] 

Will and Kate have finally emerged to face the Sock 'N' Soul public after a long journey, during which time they've been searched, examined, measured, pricked, prodded, nipped, tucked, plucked, darned, stuffed, gathered, sealed, dressed, undressed, redressed, picked, unpicked, tied, belted, bound, chained, branded, grabbed, dabbed, manhandled, womanhandled, flashed and photographed...
[*gasp for breath*]
And now they'll be listed, auctioned, and *hopefully* bought and shipped off! *phew*


If you didn't know better, you might think I was making a pair of airline passengers, surgery patients...criminals? Or maybe livestock...or horticultural produce...

*WOW, loads more ideas for new Sock 'N' Souls 
Just like that! I'm on a sock 'n' roll!!!* 

[Ahem, hem...ok, I'll be serious now...] 


Telling my tale as more would see fit:
That's no way to treat royalty, is it? 
Behind all the glamour and paparazzi, 
A royal's life is surely not a bed of purple sprouting broccoli.


Bed of brassicas, all wrapped up warm & comfy in an eggy blankie...
Which being royalty is not. No sirree!
(Thanks for loan of pic, UKTV)


There's no lack of pictures online of Prince and his 
Middleton miss, which is just as well, 
'Cos I wanted to give them my own little twist.
So media stalking aside, I thought that was swell!

Over 20 photos were saved during this while 
To make sure I knew plenty about their style 
Before settling on Will's RAF ceremonial dress 
(What he's supposedly getting wed in) 
And Kate's engagement dress, her best 
(Who knows what she's getting wed in??)

Recognisability is the thing, 
Said I. Wherein I'll capture the soul of the future King!


When two and two become one (Pics from all over)


Although mathematicians would say this is FOUR. 
Which is the number of bodies 
(Sock! not airline passengers) littered on my stage. 
That bit's a bore, so I'll leave it off this page.
But lesson learnt, from a number of follies
Don't be too clever. 
When trying to make them better than ever.

At first, I thought Will and Kate would like pert bums,
They are, after all, very best chums!
 Butt al-arse! It was not to be...
They make Sock 'N' Souljas topple, unfortunately.

'This cotton makes a nice bottom!', thought Kate

So (like always) I stuck a heel in their fronts. 
One of my customers had commented, 'Perchance,
This made his soulja's crotch 
Look rather butch', but hey! 

I don't think William would perceive me cruel,
Plus his stiffened suit would hide the crown jewel(s) 
- for politeness's sake. And I knew Kate's dress 
Would look great if I gave her breasts.

So with that, she and I kissed and made up,
All because I sewed her a loving cup.
She kicked her high heels, exclaimed HURRAH!
But thankfully declined when I offered her a bra.


The crown jewels & Kate's best dress


While we're on the subject of their bling,
They're also adorned with many a glittering thing. 
Will's badge, his medal, Kate's necklace, and, of course, THAT ring! 
How befitting of a would-be queen and king.

THAT ring.


Blue crystal diamante, instead of sapphire
Around it, studded with knotted thread all silver
Her necklace... it has the same stone really,
It's just a guess, I couldn't see the pic too clearly.

There's something special inside them too
Which makes them have, un-have, unhold and hold
How does it work? Buy them, if I may be bold
It's brilliant, that's true! Works better than glue!

To have and to hold

How long all this took, I couldn't say
Stamped on one receipt is 19th March, 
That's back three weeks away!
For the Lycra and suiting minus starch.

They're now on eBay, here is the listing
Check 'em out, I say! No use resisting...
All proceeds to the British Red Cross
Who'll help people whose lives and homes are lost.

Alright, yes, I know, 
At £300, the price ain't low.
But it means a sum of more wealth 
Than I can afford to donate myself.

Who wants them? Please bid, someone say 'I do!'
I mean, aside from the Royal Wedding two
(Although, wouldn't it be great, oh, my joy wouldn't quell
If William and Kate wanted some as well!)


Kate: [whispers] I need to get ready, let's not be late...
Will: [in a very posh voice] First, come, and kiss me Kate! 

So, all you collectors of everything
Right royal. Plates, mugs, etc., for dining.
Don't be churlish, give this a twirl!
You and I could make ours a much nicer world.

For everyone else, who's not into royalty
That's fair enough, but would you please help me?
Repost this, forward it, link, tweet or Facebook
To ask people out there to go take a look?

Many thanks in advance;
For your help and support!
I hope it's not too much trouble,
It'll really help the guys going through that rubble...

There's a jolly good chance
With all this rapport, 
That soon, parts of Japan can 
Make their living from kelp once again.

Postscript: 

By the way, while I'm here, this girl I knew from school
Called Pari. Has been doing something really cool
She's collecting photos from the Japan disaster,
You can view them here, don't think y'ave to ask her.


Monday, 8 November 2010

There's a sock to fit every soul...

A few of you have asked about customisations recently, so I thought I'd blog about it so you can make informed choices about your *ahem* Christmas shopping (& take advantage of my free delivery offer!) *plug plug*

The answer to this is a resounding YES!!! I'll customise anything you'd like me to. This applies to stock dolls and commissions (see what I did there? hehe)

    • You can get any stock doll personalised for the usual price plus an extra £10-20 typically. 

      Customised Stock 'N' Soul *wink*
    • You can commission one, which allows you to opt for virtually anything your soul desires. Because there's no limit to what you can request, it's kinda difficult for me to put a price on it right here. So if a commission is what fits your shoe best, please get in touch with details/pictures/likes/hobbies/addictions etc that you'd like me to sock up and I'd be more than happy to give you a quote. Orrrrrr you could give me a budget and I'll give you some ideas that'll fit the bill.

      The options are endless...I've made realistic action figures...

      Hey, that's me!! (no, not *me* me, it's UK Bboy Champs solo winner, Mouse)


      Here's lookin' at ya, kid!

      I've also made close friends, their hair, the clothes they wear...


      and favourite pet!


      Couples who hold hands on happy occasions...


      They can also unhold hands on unhappy occasions, but no one wants to see that

      Sock 'N' Sole ('cos it's the one and only) can also hold other things... I've borrowed this picture because it's amazing that my work can be a part of the big things in people's lives.


      Look ma, BOTH hands!!!

      These gifts are not just for Christmas, they're for life. 

      OOF!!!                         *gasp*                         *HALP!* 

      I've just been smothered by a buttery pile of corniness.

      Sorry. Normal service will resume in next blog    > . -